In a galaxy far far away (i.e. in the 1970's) one of the
greatest tear jerker movies ever made was released. It's name said it all
"Love Story".
I won't play spoiler so if you are part of the "new
generation", who knows nothing about this movie, then (a) I DARE YOU to
rent it - watch it - and not cry (and YES 1 tear constitutes crying) and (b)
this article is not for you.
To the "seasoned generation(s)" (how do you like
that word I used "seasoned" as opposed to "old"?) you know that THE memorable line, in
the movie, was "love means never having to say you’re sorry". Pause
to reflect. Still pausing. Pausing some more. Through pausing.
Anyway IN THE REAL WORLD saying you’re sorry IS important
especially when it comes to those you love. If you don't think saying you’re
sorry, or really being sorry, is not important then ask yourself this "are
you willing to lose the greatest love of your life" OR "are you
willing to permanently damage your relationship with those you care most
about" (memory lapse alert=I forgot to add the question marks so here they
are?)?
To take it a step further it is more important that you FEEL
SORRY - that you understand the other person’s point of view - that you learn
from your mistakes - and that your ACTIONS (not when you get caught or when it
is too late) reflect the reality of you being sorry.
They say (don't ask me who they are because I am still
finding out who I am in certain areas) that "you can't teach an old dog
new tricks" and this is also untrue because over these past 2 years I have
learned a lifetime of "lessons", and (sadly) the deterioration of
relationships that meant/mean the world to me, and real lessons are not...easy.
NOTHING will ever replace the interaction between the ones
we love.
NOTHING will ever replace the knowledge, the heightened
senses, and the soul turning inner feelings, of falling in love...with
the...one. The one that you waited for. The one you hoped for. The one you longed
for. The one that you just...knew.
To those who haven't found "the one"...don't give
up.
To those who have found "the one" then never let
loose - never stop listening - never stop improving - never stop telling them
how much they mean to you - never stop loving - and never EVER take them for
granted or minimize their needs. When God puts you together with "the
one" he never says it will be "easy" nor does he promise
"the status quo". As each year passes there should be a RENEWAL of
the relationship keeping the aspects that "work" for both and
striving to improve/change/etc. the aspects that..."don't". Only by
this realization, commitment, and effort can one lay their head down at night
with a loving heart not worried about what tomorrow will bring (concerning the
strength of the relationship).
I used to think that not drinking, not doing drugs, not
going out to parties/bars/etc., being a good Father, never pursuing anyone else
(for one night or otherwise) working hard, trying, etc.
was..."enough". It wasn't. The life lesson I learned is that not only
was it NOT ENOUGH but that I should have known, with every cell in my being,
that it wasn't and that I should not of fallen into the "trap" of
complacency.
For those keeping score, or who may be familiar with my
online writings, you may be aware that I was diagnosed with cancer about 2
years ago. This was in addition to an "alphabet soup" of medical
diagnosis/complications and very real mental/physical/emotional problems with
adversely affected me 24/7.
You ask "how do we get from love story - to life
lessons - to your illness"? Well, Mr. and/or Mrs. Impatient let me tell
you. But first, because I can, I will play the "pause card" and make
you read the next sentence (lesson learned...don't rush me).
There are those, both near and far, that I NEED (and are and
have been deserving) to hear me say "I'm sorry" not because I can
form the words and speak them but...because I am...and I have been and I wish I
had the chance earlier.
It's like the saying ("them again"...who are they
really?) that goes "if a tree falls in the forest, and no one is there, is
a sound made" (or something to that effect)? Well, what if you are sorry -
have been sorry - have changed for the better (in many many ways) and yet the
persons deserving of hearing these words aren't around and/or don't provide you
with the opportunity to convey these earnest feelings? Are you still...sorry?
The answer is YES and the real answer is YES and you should never forget it and
work, 24/7, to replace the lives/memories/moments (of each person deserving of
hearing the apology) with ones of; happiness, love, understanding, acceptance,
joy, peace, etc.
In summary, movies have their place. Words have their place.
Actions have their place. But none of these, individually and/or collectively,
can ever replace the exchange of a heartfelt/sincere interaction when one
conveys the words of "I'm sorry" regardless of IF or WHEN the other
person(s) accept the apology. That, my online friends, is the point of this
story and it is especially true when it is...a LOVE story.
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