Jokes About Turning FIFTY Years Old:
You can look back on your 40th birthday and wonder
what all the drama was about.
That come hither look you used to have in your eyes
just doesn't look as enticing through your bifocals.
You finally understand that being over the hill
beats being planted under it.
Your idea of getting lucky is being able to find
your car in Wal-Mart’s parking lot on the first try.
Your trick knee goes out more than you do.
Your idea of a hot time is putting a heating pad on
your bad back.
You want your kids' to think you're cool, so you ask
them to help set up your own page on My Face and you can't understand what
they're giggling about.
Getting some action means all those prunes your
doctor is making you eat are doing their job.
You and your teeth have decided that a separation is
the best thing for your relationship.
Getting high means it's time to take your blood
pressure medication.
Punching a time clock is probably the most exercise
you'll get all day.
Being asked "Do you want fries with that?"
beats being the one doing the asking.
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